Up and down the country there are 30 something’s contemplating how to off their parents, they are upstairs in their bedrooms pulling down tired old posters and plotting.
The average age of a first time buyer is 38 which is enough to drive anyone to murder, in my parents day they were married and owned thier own home by 25 anyone who didn’t was treated like McCloud from Highlander, jeered, spat at, headbutted and banished from the local community.
Kids, no sorry 38 years olds are risking their own life’s to pop the parents off, climbing up onto the roof and blocking the chimneys, loosening the steering wheel on mums Toyota Yaris , faking their own deaths in the hope their parents will die of a broken heart, double booking premier rooms at the Swiss euthanasia clinic
It’s the Baby Boomers generation that have caused this, our grandparents celebrated the end of war with plenty of fucking which resulted in our parents, who if you have a home of your own are thankfully living longer because of advances in medication and better diets.
My thirties have been preoccupied with trying to get a place of my own, my parents breathed a sigh of relief when I pulled their heads from out of the bath and gasped that I could have some money, so they and I are getting on with our life’s, mine burden with debt and theirs no longer preoccupied with my whereabouts and whether ive been drinking or not.
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